Blood Sucking Freaks (1976)

Blood Sucking Freaks

A sad little S+M comedy, torture porn before there was the mainstream stuff. Horribly acted, horribly filmed, horribly scripted. Tho there were a few redeeming factors:

Dancing hispanic midget in overalls.
A lot of topless women.
The cops are totally creepy.
A cardboard cage with a door that never closes, full of naked cannibals.
A murderous topless ballet.
A woman who gets her feet cut off, yet survives for weeks to crawling around.
A great hammer to the head murder!

But the silliness is overwhelming and the gore is laughable. Some of the set design saves the day, as every thrift store and apartment basement were utilized to full extent. Sardu’s black turtleneck screams PERVERT!

Avoid.

Black Devil Doll (1984)

seriously, the credits took 7 minutes because the film editor’s original song was playing behind them. Casio bombipbombip soundtrack. And while the main character, a church going, god fearin bible thumping prude is on the phone with her oversexed friend, the camera is just panning around to focus on various things in her house. The sink, the wall, the fern. Its awesome!

First thing to do when you get that freeky little puppet home? Take a shower. So it can watch. OH! Hello Boobs!

A whole nightmare is depicted and then re-shown as it happens, again, for real, this time. There is 17 minutes I will not get back.

oh no, the devil doll is going to make the bunny watch!
That puppet tongue looks hurtful and mean.
And the braids? Really? ICK.

I thought that just happened in pornos, where you can be walking down the street with some stolen coats and a sex maniac knocks on her window to call you in for some of the good times. I guess the doll sex turned her into a slut! OH NO. That bunny is going to witness a lot of freakin’!

Now they are proving dancing sucked in the 80s for everyone!

player 2 : “I’ve been told I have a way with the ladies, but you’re not doing anything for my reputation or ego.”

She’s in love with a puppet! But its not in love with her, nope, it just melted her brains right out of her nose. Dumb.

Arrogant little bunny, with its cymbals.

The whole movie is starting again! OH NO!

Seriously, the worst thing I have ever seen. Mainly for the inept camera work, terrible acting, horrible soundtrack which I think was an auto-setting on a casio keyboard, bad puppeteer, waaaay to sloooow, inaudible dialogue, terrible dancing, and longest opening credits ever. You got to see this. I will email you an attachment if you want.